I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It's blow job season.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
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