If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Randomize
