U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Randomize
