But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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