The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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