Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I'm at about main and main street
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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