My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
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