In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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