i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Randomize
