Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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