So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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