If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
