it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Randomize