There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize