so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize
