chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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