yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
I think people are normalizing furries
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Randomize
