Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
