i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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