How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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