look no pants
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize
