Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
