Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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