He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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