You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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