I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Randomize
