basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
