sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
