Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
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