I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize