ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
it was like eating out sand paper
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
as a side note pls kill me
Randomize
