Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
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