her vagine was all disorganized.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
