Like all of my pajamas are shirts of guys I shacked with in college
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
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