Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
