"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize
