We're facebook friends in real life
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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