GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
Randomize
