You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I need moral support for this bender
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
