Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I just found my "random bang list for summer of 2012" that I wrote last night.. It's written on a Plan B receipt. If this isn't irony I don't know what is.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
