I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Randomize
