Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
