I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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