If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
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