You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Major life highlight, she said my dick taste like coffee.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
