i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
My mom said she was relieved to see that I'd gained some weight bc she's "always worried" that I might have AIDS.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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