oh god the rape fog is back!
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
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