ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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