Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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