i already hear my dad disowning me
i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
Randomize