im gay
i know
yea but for you.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
